Growing Old Awkwardly

122 Where-do-I-liveOne of the weird things about being a lesbian, and I assume the same holds true for gay men and others of a non-heteronormative persuasion, is that there’s really no societal rules to obey or milestones to reach. For instance, I’ve never looked at my watch and thought, “Oh shit! I didn’t realize how late it was. I better hurry up and find a husband!” And although things are much different now, it wasn’t all that long ago that no one would have thought to ask when I was going to get around to birthing some babies. Back then, lesbians just had dogs. Now we’re collecting babies like they’re on sale at J. Crew. Continue reading →

Need Some Karma Points??

curious george

If you’re in the market for a good deed to do, I’ve got a great opportunity for you. Aside from being an excellent writer, I’m also highly skilled at producing terrible animation … a talent I discovered only recently. I’m happy to have found an artistic outlet that doesn’t require an abundance of artistic ability, and I’m grateful to the app developer for providing a tool (Rough Animator) that also didn’t require a great deal of expertise or prior knowledge.
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We’re Not Number One!

digits-705666_960_720For far too long there’s been a feud between lesbians and bisexual women … sort of an LGBT Hatfields and McCoys. Some lesbians apparently think that bisexual women are just refusing to admit that they’re actually gay and claim to be bisexual to keep a foot in the hetero word. And there are those who warn that bisexuals always go back to the D. As one who’s been dumped for both the D and the V, let me just say for the record that they both suck. Finally there’s the camp that says being in a relationship with a bi woman means making allowances for her to dabble in her other gender attractions. Continue reading →

The Anxiety Express

0120 anxietyAll things considered, when it comes to a lack of mental wellness, I could have done a lot worse. There are no voices telling me what to do, I’m relatively sure that everything I see actually exists and I consider being alive preferable to the alternative. Still, if I’d known the details of this whole bipolar thing, I might have signed up for something different.

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Pardon My Stereotype

Eleven stories and 13,000 words into my thousand story odyssey and I haven’t yet run screaming into the night. Having 989 stories to go may seem overwhelming … because it is overwhelming. Which is why I’m counting little steps of progress as wins rather than focusing on the big (scary) picture.

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Countdown To Panic

117 panicMost people are familiar with the warning “be careful what you ask for, you just might get it.” To me, it seems mostly applicable to situations where you find yourself with the opportunity to have a wish or three granted, but had to use careful wordage and phrasing due to the tendency of bottle-dwelling genies to be quite literal. Or maybe spending eternity crammed inside a bottle has just turned them into assholes. Continue reading →

Night Patrol

As a kid, I remember starting most summer days with the announcement, “I’m gonna go play!” as I walked out the front door. Going to play could have meant anything from creating a chalk-art masterpiece on the sidewalk in front of my house to stalking lizards on the train tracks behind the bowling alleys. I might have made a pit stop at home to grab a drink, but I was just as likely to hijack a neighbor’s hose for its thirst quenching properties.

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