In my mind, I began to scroll through the cast of characters from every lesbian movie I’d ever seen. I love so many of them! Who was my favorite? It could have been either Rachel or Luce from Imagine Me and You. They’re just so adorable! Then there’s Peyton and Elena from Elena Undone. That kiss, though … amirite??? Of course, Maggie and Kim are better than chocolate in Better Than Chocolate. I couldn’t take my eyes of Cory and Violet in Bound and who didn’t love Annabelle and Simone in Loving Annabelle? Don’t even get me started on Lucy Diamond in D.E.B.S., that woman was mad hot and badass! Continue reading →
I don’t know if you’ve noticed among people on Twitter (hell, I don’t even know if you’re on Twitter and in a position to notice), but there are those who use their little profile space to get very specific about their sexual orientation and/or gender identity. Rarely do you see something that just says plain, old lesbian. Well, unless she’s got a rather non-descript appearance and is wandering through her twilight years, I guess …
What I mean, though, is that you don’t see many people who just identify as a lesbian or a gay man. You know, there was a time when being a single sexual-orientation had quite the cachet. We protested the injustices, we took to the streets, we paved the way toward tolerance and acceptance. And when I say “we,” of course, I mean a bunch of other people with cultural awareness and a sense of right and wrong that extended beyond their own wants and needs. Continue reading →
At what point does being single go from a temporary state to a lifestyle to a life? If you’re a rebounder, you may never have extended periods of downtime, bouncing out of one relationship and right into the next one. Or you could be a person who prefers to take a bit of time after the demise of one coupling to regroup before you’re ready to take up with anyone new.
That regrouping time would make singlehood a temporary condition. Just a little lull in the romantical area while you reassess what went wrong in your previous relationship and strategize to not to let it happen again. This is also the time where you likely listen to a lot of sad songs, have imaginary conversations with your Ex about what you should have said during that final argument and fantasize about running into him/her/them with your new, hotter partner while they’re looking particularly lonely and desperate or hooked up with some skank. It’s not a good time to be dating.
Unless you’re in grade school or younger (and if you are, please log off — this blog is not for you), there are things that make you realize you’re getting older.
In junior high your body changes. In high school, you get the driver’s license experience. In your twenties, you have college or moving out on your own. Or the pressure to move out. Or the begging and pleading and cajoling to a please move the fuck out already!
Then you turn thirty and everything starts making you feel old. You stop getting carded in bars. Baristas start calling you “ma ‘am.” You sit down to watch the Grammys and have no idea who anyone is.
I also understand that for heterosexuals the clock starts tick-tocking on when you’ll get married and start reproducing. I did not experience this, because when I was that age, marriage equality wasn’t even on the horizon. Perhaps now that it exists, thirty-something lesbians and gay men feel the same pressure to get married, but I haven’t seen any studies or the matter, so I can’t be sure.
One of the weird things about being a lesbian, and I assume the same holds true for gay men and others of a non-heteronormative persuasion, is that there’s really no societal rules to obey or milestones to reach. For instance, I’ve never looked at my watch and thought, “Oh shit! I didn’t realize how late it was. I better hurry up and find a husband!” And although things are much different now, it wasn’t all that long ago that no one would have thought to ask when I was going to get around to birthing some babies. Back then, lesbians just had dogs. Now we’re collecting babies like they’re on sale at J. Crew. Continue reading →
For far too long there’s been a feud between lesbians and bisexual women … sort of an LGBT Hatfields and McCoys. Some lesbians apparently think that bisexual women are just refusing to admit that they’re actually gay and claim to be bisexual to keep a foot in the hetero word. And there are those who warn that bisexuals always go back to the D. As one who’s been dumped for both the D and the V, let me just say for the record that they both suck. Finally there’s the camp that says being in a relationship with a bi woman means making allowances for her to dabble in her other gender attractions. Continue reading →
Every time someone in the LGBTQIAXYZLMNOP community comes out, a unicorn poops a rainbow!
Most people are familiar with the warning “be careful what you ask for, you just might get it.” To me, it seems mostly applicable to situations where you find yourself with the opportunity to have a wish or three granted, but had to use careful wordage and phrasing due to the tendency of bottle-dwelling genies to be quite literal. Or maybe spending eternity crammed inside a bottle has just turned them into assholes. Continue reading →
As a kid, I remember starting most summer days with the announcement, “I’m gonna go play!” as I walked out the front door. Going to play could have meant anything from creating a chalk-art masterpiece on the sidewalk in front of my house to stalking lizards on the train tracks behind the bowling alleys. I might have made a pit stop at home to grab a drink, but I was just as likely to hijack a neighbor’s hose for its thirst quenching properties.
One afternoon, I was relaxing in the shade of one of the big trees on my country estate and watching some of the village children play on the hillside below.