Alphabet Soup

Unless you’re in grade school or younger (and if you are, please log off — this blog is not for you), there are things that make you realize you’re getting older.

In junior high your andy-warhol-campbells-alphabet-soupbody changes. In high school, you get the driver’s license experience. In your twenties, you have college or moving out on your own. Or the pressure to move out. Or the begging and pleading and cajoling to a please move the fuck out already!

Then you turn thirty and everything starts making you feel old. You stop getting carded in bars. Baristas start calling you “ma ‘am.” You sit down to watch the Grammys and have no idea who anyone is.

I also understand that for heterosexuals the clock starts tick-tocking on when you’ll get married and start reproducing. I did not experience this, because when I was that age, marriage equality wasn’t even on the horizon. Perhaps now that it exists, thirty-something lesbians and gay men feel the same pressure to get married, but I haven’t seen any studies or the matter, so I can’t be sure.

Continue reading →

We’re Not Number One!

digits-705666_960_720For far too long there’s been a feud between lesbians and bisexual women … sort of an LGBT Hatfields and McCoys. Some lesbians apparently think that bisexual women are just refusing to admit that they’re actually gay and claim to be bisexual to keep a foot in the hetero word. And there are those who warn that bisexuals always go back to the D. As one who’s been dumped for both the D and the V, let me just say for the record that they both suck. Finally there’s the camp that says being in a relationship with a bi woman means making allowances for her to dabble in her other gender attractions. Continue reading →

Ain’t Nobody’s Business If I Do

More and more often I see or hear or read something that makes me feel like I’m getting increasingly bad at being a member of the gay community. For example, I don’t know even know if “the gay community” is still a thing. If it is, are the qualifications for membership still the same? And if it isn’t, then what group am I a member of?
Continue reading →

Missing The Valentine Gene

Quick! What’s the best reason not to date me? If you said Valentine’s Day you are absolutely correct! Although to be fair, depending on your point of view that’s either an easy question or a trick one; because of course, it’s also the only conceivable reason not to. Therefore, if you guessed right then, oh you know me so well; and if you guessed otherwise, not to worry … I’m sure you’ll get up to speed on your Lesbiana trivia shortly.. Continue reading →

Breaking Up-Breaking Up Is Hard To Do

I was with my last girlfriend, who was my wife for about a year and a half after we married in 2008 when it was briefly legal in California, for seventeen years (I think I still refer to her as my girlfriend rather than my wife because she was the former for so much longer than the latter). I wrote about what
Continue reading →