Alphabet Soup

Unless you’re in grade school or younger (and if you are, please log off — this blog is not for you), there are things that make you realize you’re getting older.

In junior high your andy-warhol-campbells-alphabet-soupbody changes. In high school, you get the driver’s license experience. In your twenties, you have college or moving out on your own. Or the pressure to move out. Or the begging and pleading and cajoling to a please move the fuck out already!

Then you turn thirty and everything starts making you feel old. You stop getting carded in bars. Baristas start calling you “ma ‘am.” You sit down to watch the Grammys and have no idea who anyone is.

I also understand that for heterosexuals the clock starts tick-tocking on when you’ll get married and start reproducing. I did not experience this, because when I was that age, marriage equality wasn’t even on the horizon. Perhaps now that it exists, thirty-something lesbians and gay men feel the same pressure to get married, but I haven’t seen any studies or the matter, so I can’t be sure.

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Excuses, Excuses, Excuses

I guess I’m not doing the greatest job of resurrecting poor Pucker Up. But in my defense (what? I’m not being defensive, you’re being defensive!), I have been busy writing and doing other projects. That’s unusual for me because generally when I go on hiatus, it’s because I’m in avoidance mode.

I’ve got a profile out on Upwork and I’ve been getting some freelance work via the site, some writing and some animation. I just finished an animation gig that I’d love to share, but the client hasn’t posted it yet, so I can’t leapfrog him and debut it before he does. But, all in good time. I’ve also been doing my fair share of ghostwriting, which I can’t talk much about because I signed non-disclosure agreements. I find that my writing seems to be more popular with European than American clients, although I couldn’t begin to guess why.

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Buttercup’s Resurrection

How long can a blog remain dormant and still be viable? We’re about to find out.

I last posted to Pucker Up Buttercup nearly threback bitches 01e years ago. Since then, she (yes, she … Buttercup identifies as female) has sat un-updated and, I’m assuming, unread. An abandoned blog, adrift in the Blogosphere, like a tumbleweed spinning across the desert, accompanied only by the sound of crickets and the occasional howl of a lone coyote.

At least, that’s how I’ve thought of her, and I’ve felt guilty for it. Buttercup deserves better. She’s a good blog and I’m proud of her. But, when you’ve got a case of the bipolars, it can be difficult to be a consistent blogger. And when you’re inconsistent, the time between posts can be erratic. I’d have good spells where I posted nearly every day. Then I’d fall in the hole and not make an appearance for weeks or months.

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Growing Old Awkwardly

122 Where-do-I-liveOne of the weird things about being a lesbian, and I assume the same holds true for gay men and others of a non-heteronormative persuasion, is that there’s really no societal rules to obey or milestones to reach. For instance, I’ve never looked at my watch and thought, “Oh shit! I didn’t realize how late it was. I better hurry up and find a husband!” And although things are much different now, it wasn’t all that long ago that no one would have thought to ask when I was going to get around to birthing some babies. Back then, lesbians just had dogs. Now we’re collecting babies like they’re on sale at J. Crew. Continue reading →

Need Some Karma Points??

curious george

If you’re in the market for a good deed to do, I’ve got a great opportunity for you. Aside from being an excellent writer, I’m also highly skilled at producing terrible animation … a talent I discovered only recently. I’m happy to have found an artistic outlet that doesn’t require an abundance of artistic ability, and I’m grateful to the app developer for providing a tool (Rough Animator) that also didn’t require a great deal of expertise or prior knowledge.
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We’re Not Number One!

digits-705666_960_720For far too long there’s been a feud between lesbians and bisexual women … sort of an LGBT Hatfields and McCoys. Some lesbians apparently think that bisexual women are just refusing to admit that they’re actually gay and claim to be bisexual to keep a foot in the hetero word. And there are those who warn that bisexuals always go back to the D. As one who’s been dumped for both the D and the V, let me just say for the record that they both suck. Finally there’s the camp that says being in a relationship with a bi woman means making allowances for her to dabble in her other gender attractions. Continue reading →

The Anxiety Express

0120 anxietyAll things considered, when it comes to a lack of mental wellness, I could have done a lot worse. There are no voices telling me what to do, I’m relatively sure that everything I see actually exists and I consider being alive preferable to the alternative. Still, if I’d known the details of this whole bipolar thing, I might have signed up for something different.

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Pardon My Stereotype

Eleven stories and 13,000 words into my thousand story odyssey and I haven’t yet run screaming into the night. Having 989 stories to go may seem overwhelming … because it is overwhelming. Which is why I’m counting little steps of progress as wins rather than focusing on the big (scary) picture.

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